Question:
About a year ago, I become interested in Buddhism, mainly as a philosophy. I still stand by this philosophical stand point, but I still have questions.
You see, when people ask me what my religion is, I generally just say “I’m an atheist, but I share some Buddhist beliefs also”. Now generally after saying this I quickly get such responses as “But you listen to metal!” or even “But you watch really violent and gory movies!” and this apparently makes me a bad person. It’s true though, I’m a fan of the more extreme side of music, with stuff like Death metal, Black metal, and Grindcore. This isn’t certainly the only music I listen too, and the same goes with movies.
I enjoy my share of violent movies such as Zombie, Cannibal, and exploitation films. Because of this, people tell me that I’m a bad Buddhist, after which I usually ask why. They will go on about how it makes you violent, dangerous, and over all mean person. But I’m the exact opposite, I’m a very happy and easy person to get along with. So enough of this, but I’m wondering for someone else opinion. If such movies and music are having no negative effects on my behavior, actions, or even thoughts towards harming others. Is it really bad? I’ve always heard it’s good to perceive the world as it really is, and the world isn’t always happy and full of sunshine.
Answer:
Not often, but once in a while I get a question where I chuckle the entire time time I’m writing the answer.
I had to laugh when your email came in, because I had just finished watching the first two “Saw” movies only minutes before. I am a major fan of horror films, always have been and probably always will be. Generally, I prefer the less gory ones from the 50’s and 60’s, but I like a good modern “bloodbath” film once in a while (Romero and Fulci’s zombie movies are great!). I’m going to talk about movies from here on, but the same goes for music and videogames.
There are two conflicting ideas here: That Buddhists are pacifistic nonviolent people, and horror movies depict murder, torture, sadism, as well as gratuitous blood and gore. The real question is whether or not these two ideas are incompatible.
Here are my thoughts on the subject; feel free to add your own comments.
1) Do you believe that horror films and loud music (video games too!) cause violence? There is research that goes both ways, but most of it has been done on impressionable children, and even then, it’s an arguable point. You don’t sound like a child, so I also assume you are a grown-up who has learned the difference between right and wrong, fantasy and reality, film and life. Children may not always have that ability, but you do.
2) You like zombie and cannibal movies. I’m guessing you aren’t a cannibal. Do you fantasize about eating people? I suspect not; if I’m wrong about that, keep it to yourself. If you don’t do the actions or think about doing them, whats the harm in watching them? Horror movies are a release from the tensions and fears of real life, which, in their own way, reduces suffering. As I write this, I am reminded of “A Sensitive Topic” from last week, and I suppose the two situations do have their similarities.
3) Buddhism is very much about stripping away illusions that we carry around with us. You know that these movies aren’t real, and if anything, Buddhism should help reinforce that idea. Not only aren’t the movies real, in many ways, your normal life isn’t what you think it is, either.
4) This might be stretching things a bit, but we have talked here before about the practice of “meditating on a corpse,” where a meditator concentrates and imagines various stages of death. I think the “in your face” approach to death that movies show may not offer the same benefits, but there’s probably an argument in that idea somewhere; experience with death reduces fear of death.
5) What you are REALLY dealing with here are other people’s preconceived notions about what a Buddhist SHOULD be like. Use the opportunity to “enlighten” them about what Buddhists believe and why you are a “real one.” Never turn down an opportunity to teach others.
There may or may not be more productive uses for your (and my) time, but that’s not really a topic for right now.
Question
Discipline has its place, but you already know that. The problem is that with discipline of any kind, the child cries, pouts, or otherwise displays ‚Äúhurt.‚Äù We feel bad because we have ‚Äúhurt‚Äù the child. I don’t mean physical hurting, I mean displeasure at not getting their way or maybe shame/guilt at being reprimanded. Yet, even with something like a time-out, standing in the corner, or losing a toy for the day, the crying begins.
Is that a bad thing? You are in fact creating suffering for the child. Surely that cannot be a good thing. On the other hand, think of the alternative to proper discipline. We’ve all been in stores and seen someone else’s little monsters acting up while their parents ignore them; we comment that ‚Äúmy child would never act like that.‚Äù Why wouldn’t your children act like that? Discipline. Eventually, children learn social rules and will behave appropriately on their own, but is that the case for very young children? No. Children are in many ways, “primitive.” They understand fear. Fear of what disobeying means. Fear (and in a Buddhist sense, suffering) can be a valuable learning tool. We learn not to do those things which cause suffering.
Then I began to reflect on the idea that this was an opportunity to be kind. The cat was providing me an opportunity to experience love and kindness and to work with my habits of impatience and lack of tolerance. I pet the cat…..I pay attention…..I send a thought of thanks to the cat for providing me with the opportunity to be consciously kind……I pay attention to my emotions…..I pet the cat. I begin to make this a practice. Soon it had spilled over into my personal relationships. I would be sitting with a friend and something would bring me back to attention. I would acknowledge the opportunity to be kind, to engage in a friendship. I would send a thought of thanks to my friend or my wife. My world has provided me with an opportunity that allows me to practice Attention, Loving Kindness, Gratitude, and Patience by simply petting a cat. If I did this on auto pilot like I have done through out my life there would be no connection. Instead I took the practice of Attention off of the cushion where I learned it and I applied it to my reality. The reality that is happening all the time and I’m given a blessing by a small annoying cat!
Toyo wished to do sanzen also.